May 2005 / Volume Six / Issue Three
Mather Schneider
Mell’s Story

Charlie was at The Iguana
he’s a Yaqui like me
but Charlie’s blind
he had his cane hanging on his knee
and his girlfriend Barbara was there
she’s an albino
she’s white like you

so this dirty guy notices Charlie’s blind
and decides to make a move on Barbara
she’s an albino but still not bad looking

anyway she whispers to Charlie
This guy’s getting pretty close
and Charlie whispers back How close is he?
and she whispers Real close
He’s right there
Right here? Charlie whispers
Yeah right there.

and Charlie just stands up real slow with that crazy stare of his
no dark glasses or anything just those milky eyes
and he backs away from his stool
and reaches around Barbara
and grabs the guy by the neck and arm
and hauls him out the door

outside everybody is watching
it was about three in the afternoon
Charlie had the guy pinned down on the sidewalk
and Charlie says You had enough?
and the guy grunts something which we take to be a yes
and Charlie gets up
and we all go back inside and leave the guy there
you could tell he wasn’t really hurt

now I like Charlie and no disrespect
but if I got my ass kicked by a blind guy
I would be so fucking embarrassed
I don’t think I’d ever go back in there again
but you know what this dumb ass did
he just came right back in about ten minutes later

and he didn’t do nothing that time
he just sat at a table by himself
and rubbed his eyes.
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