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March 2005 / Volume VI / Issue II | ||||||||||
Willie Smith | ||||||||||
Ode to the South African Clockwork Automatic Shotgun Shorter than a riding crop, no bulkier than a plumber’s helper. Releases a 2.6 second burst of twelve shells into any crowd approaching too close for comfort. Also compatible with solid shot. Magazine may be loaded and key-wound in less than twenty-five seconds. At which point the crowd is ready for another 2.6 second burst of a couple thousand pellets hurled faster than sound in a pattern guaranteed to spatter the most guts on the wall, for your money. Weighs under ten pounds. May be held in one hand, as there is virtually no recoil. Clockwork programmed to bypass duds. Impossible to jam. This gun is music to the clenched teeth of Civilizations’s ears. Intended for use against outrageous attacks. You may want one for around the home. WARNING: International Law strictly prohibits use of this weapon on pheasant. |
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RETURN to MARCH 2005 |