July 2004 / Volume Five / Issue Three / Online
Michael Estabrook
Not a Chance

So you think I wish to die
slowly on my soft warm deathbed,
meandering through my myriad
memories, reliving and repenting
those miserable moments in my
life, moments I would give
anything to take back, do over
again, times when I was
deceitful, cowardly, weak,
greedy, envious, frightened,
uncivilized, selfish, nasty,
dishonest, narrow-minded,
brutish, hypocritical, and
untrue. Not a chance, no thank
you, take me fast, please, dear
Lord, in one big smashing
crashing blood-splattering
collision with a bus, a loaded
dump truck or a lumbering train.